A Prescription for Love ~ Chapter Seven

This is different from the norm. In all of the stories that I’ve read or that I’ve seen, all of the characters are disgustingly perfect unless they are written with very clear flaws. This story is about love (um, duh! Look who’s writing it. I’m the queen of romance), and finding it in the least likely place with the least likely person.

Now, this story is based in a hospital. My medical training comes from…WebMD. I’m not a doctor, nor do I claim to be. I’m a music teacher who has a wild imagination and a penchant for all things Twilight (and with this story, added in a mix of ER! I loved Luca Kovac…) Which brings me to my disclaimer: None of this is mine. I’m not, nor ever will be, Stephenie Meyer. If was, I’d be rolling in the dough from her insane imagination that gave us Bella and Edward. No copyright infringement is intended.

Chapter Seven

BPOV

Was it a dream? Did last night really happen? Was I kissed by Edward? I slowly opened my eyes and saw that I was in my new room in Angela’s apartment. Behind me, I felt warmth. Then, a tightening around my waist. I looked over my shoulder and saw a delightfully rumpled Edward lying behind me. Traces of my lipstick on his mouth confirmed my sleepy questions. We had kissed. The swelling on his lips indicated that we had kissed a lot.

I turned in his arms and ran my fingers through his soft hair. He hummed groggily and pulled me closer to his hard body. Jesus, he’s built like a fucking god. Those abs…those pecs…and god damn it, that tattoo… 

“It’s too early, Bella,” he rumbled.

“Sorry,” I giggled. “Someone was pressing on my bladder.”

“You could have just asked,” he said, opening one bleary eye. “You look guilty.”

“I’m not guilty of anything,” I said, biting my lip. Okay, I’m guilty of blatantly ogling you while you were sleeping. Is that a bad thing?

“Uh huh. You’re biting you lip. You do that when you’re unsure or when you’re lying,” he said as his hand moved to my hip. “You seem to be pretty sure about right now so it has to indicate that you’re lying.”

“Nope,” I squeaked as I tried to wiggle out of his arms, trying not to laugh. He was very close to my ticklish spot on my side. He moved his hand up to the dip in my waist. “Please don’t.”

“Don’t what?” he asked, his green eyes dancing. He squeezed my side and I squirmed, doing a little squeak giggle combo. “Is someone ticklish?”

“Never,” I said, pressing my lips together to stop the giggles that threatened to erupt from my mouth.

“You’re a liar, Swan,” he smirked as his hand slid underneath my t-shirt and his fingers gently ran over my side, just below my ribs. I laughed, throwing my head back gleefully.

“Stop! I’ve got to pee,” I giggled. “Unless you want to deal with the clean up…”

“Okay,” he said as his hands left my body. However, he stared at me as I calmed myself. “Do you know how beautiful you are when you laugh? It’s so fucking gorgeous, Bella.”

A blushed and ducked my head. I truly couldn’t believe it. It was first thing in the morning. Gorgeous is the last thing I probably was. I wriggled and managed to get out of Edward’s embrace. I smiled as I left my bedroom and into my bathroom. I went to the bathroom and brushed my teeth. I checked my reflection in the bathroom and I honestly didn’t see the ‘beauty’ that Edward mentioned. I hadn’t taken off my makeup the night before and my mascara was smudged underneath my eyes, my hair was smashed and I had pillow lines marring my cheeks. Attractive. I washed my face and pulled my hair into a ponytail. I finished inside of the bathroom and walked back into my bedroom. Edward was leaning against the headboard of my bed, looking fucking sexy in his glasses and yeah, he was shirtless. Still.

“Do you want something for breakfast?” I asked. “I can whip up something if you like.”

“In a minute,” he said. “Can you come and sit by me?”

“Did I do something wrong?” I asked, my heart stammering.

“What? No! Bella, you did nothing wrong,” he said. “I just want to talk about us. And where we stand on our relationship.”

“Oh, okay,” I said as I climbed into the bed, sitting facing him with my legs curled underneath me. Ideally I would have liked to have been out of my pajamas and in a bra, but he seemed adamant on talking now.

“Bella, you know I like you, right?”

“I do. However, I’m still trying to figure out why,” I quipped, trying to be funny. However, based off Edward’s frown, my joke fell flat. “Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize, Bella. It just bothers me when you put yourself down,” he said. “You’re an incredibly gorgeous woman with a big heart and loving soul. I understand why you put yourself down since you never really had anyone on your side. Anyone to tell you that you’re beautiful…but you are. So beautiful.”

“I’m trying, Edward. Fourteen years of ridicule and torment is not going to change overnight,” I said quietly. 

“I’m working on it, though.”

“I’m glad, but I have to ask…why?” he questioned, arching a brow over his glasses.

“Why am I working on getting better?” I clarified. Edward nodded. “Because, I’m ready to stop living in the shadows. Now, your friendship and attention has done a lot for my attitude, but it’s also showed me what I should be able to get. I shouldn’t be Charlie’s conduit of abuse. I shouldn’t be the nurse that everyone tortures at work. I am worth of so many things. However, I’m just not used such positive attention. I’m unaccustomed to receive compliments or praise. I was always Nurse Swine or Worthless Offspring.”

“Who called you Nurse Swine?” Edward asked, his green eyes icing over.

“Dr. Crowley and Dr. Newton. Never in front of patients or anything, but in their conversations, I heard them refer to me as that,” I blushed. “I included it in my complaint to Dr. Sanchez. Should I have included you on it?”

“I can talk to Eleazar on my next shift. Their behavior is highly unprofessional. We are all in the same business of making sure that our patients are cared for. Not to tease your co-workers,” Edward snarled. “I have yet to work with Dr. Newton but I met Dr. Crowley on my first day after I filled out the paperwork at HR. He was the one who warned me about the coffee. He also warned me about you and your ‘incompetence.’ I’m thinking I’ll be having a conversation with Dr. Crowley.”

“If you feel it’s best,” I frowned.

“It is, Bella. He was acting like a total tool and his assessment of your work is highly unwarranted. You’re one of the best nurses on the floor. And I’m not talking as your boyfriend. I’m talking as the associate head of the ER,” he said.

“Boyfriend?”

“Well, shit. I was hoping to ask you if you wanted to be, I don’t know, well…” he fumbled, “um, if you wanted to be exclusive? God, I sound like a complete idiot. I should just write you damn note. ‘Will you be my girlfriend? Yes or no?’”

“Can you hand me my journal? It’s on the nightstand,” I whispered. He furrowed his brow when he handed me the journal. “Actually, it’s for you. Write me a note.”

“Seriously?”

“Yep,” I giggled.

Edward smiled crookedly and turned to the next blank page in my journal. “Why don’t you fix us some breakfast and I’ll write you your note, okay?”

“Kay,” I said as I got up out of the bed. “Any preferences?”

“Food,” he said with a shrug. “I’m a guy. I’m like a human garbage disposal. I’ll eat anything. Except calamari. That shit tastes like deep fried rubber bands. Blech.”

“Duly noted,” I said as I headed into the kitchen. I made some coffee and decided to make some hangover food for everyone. I was fine since I stopped drinking early but I just knew that Angela was going to be feeling it today and Ben, he was probably sore from all of the sexing he got last night. I made eggs, sausage, bacon and hash browns. As I cooked, Ben came out of Angela’s room, walking like a zombie.

“BACON! Processed Pork Products!” he bellowed.

“You’re such a guy, Ben,” I snorted as I dished him a plate. “Does your other half want something?”

“No. She’s too busy worshiping the porcelain god right now,” Ben said as he plopped down at the kitchen table. “Are you alone?” Ben waggled his brows.

“No. Edward’s in my room,” I blushed.

“So, are you two ‘official’ or something?” Ben asked, digging into his breakfast.

“I think so. We were kind of talking about it when he asked for some breakfast,” I chuckled.

“Bella? Do you have any scrubs here?” Edward called from my bedroom. “I really don’t want to wear my dress clothes.”

“Hold on,” I said. “Can you mind the eggs while I get some scrubs for him?”

“Sure, Bella,” Ben smiled as he hopped up to man my spot at the stove. I headed back into my bedroom and went into the dresser that was still pretty empty. However, I did have a pair of scrubs from the hospital in there that I swiped a few weeks back that were in my messenger bag. I handed Edward the scrubs and he smiled gratefully.

“I have an extra toothbrush in the medicine cabinet in the bathroom, too,” I said as I smiled shyly at him.

“Thanks, sweet girl,” he said as he kissed my cheek. “I left you a note. Read it after I go, okay?”

 I blinked and nodded at him. He darted across the hall and did his morning routine while I went back to the kitchen to finish breakfast. Angela was sitting at the table, groaning quietly as she had her head on the formica table. “You okay, Ang?”

“Shhhhh!” she hissed. “Talk quieter. Too loud.”

“Here, Ang,” I said as a poured a glass of orange juice and handing her two ibuprofen. I also found some vitamin B in her cabinets and included that with her ibuprofen. “Drink this up, then a bottle of water. Slowly, though. You don’t want to throw it up.”

“Okay. But seriously, quiet down. You’re like yelling,” she said, glowering at me.

“Sure, Ang,” I snickered. She stuck her tongue out at me and downed her pills. Edward padded out into the kitchen and took one look at Angela and bit his lip to not laugh. I shrugged and dished him a plate of food. He sat down and I put a cup of coffee along with his plate in front of him. He rubbed his hands together happily and dug into his meal as I finished making a plate for myself. Angela just stared off into space, looking very green.

“I’m never drinking again,” she groaned.

“You say that now,” I said.

“Seriously. I hate having hangovers. Did I even make it to midnight?”

“Yeah, Angela,” Ben laughed nervously. “Don’t you remember? I mean, we…well, you know?”

“Great! I had amazing sex and I don’t even remember it? Fuck,” Angela growled, putting her head into her arms.

“Well, I guess that means I’ll have to make up for it,” Ben said with a slow grin. “You know the best cure for a hangover is orgasms. I don’t have to be at the hospital until three. We’ve got at least three hours before I have to go.”

 Angela looked up at him and smiled slowly. Then she realized she had an audience. “Um, do you mind?” she asked, blushing.

“Go ahead, Ang,” I giggled. “Don’t have too much fun and keep the screaming to the minimum.”

“I don’t scream,” Angela said flatly.

“Sorry, baby, but you do,” Ben chortled. Angela glared at him as he sprinted back to Angela’s room. She was quick to follow him. The dull thud and Ben’s shriek indicated that she had pounced on him, causing him some mild amounts of pain.

“They’re cute,” Edward laughed.

“They are. Ang has been crushing on Ben for awhile now and it’s exciting that they are finally together,” I answered. “So, what are you going to do for the rest of the day?”

“Hang out here until you kick my pasty white ass out of your place,” he smirked, leaning over his now empty plate of breakfast food. “If that’s alright.”

“That sounds nice. Do you want to watch some of the College Bowl games?”

“As long as I get to cuddle with you, sure,” he replied. I blushed. Again. “Now, you cooked breakfast, I’ll do the dishes.”

“It’s really no big…” I started.

“Go and shower and make yourself more beautiful. I’ll do the dishes,” he said as he helped me out of my chair and pushed me toward my bathroom. I turned and began to protest. Edward pointed to the bathroom. I chuckled and headed into my room, picking up some clothes to wear. I decided to be comfy and wear a pair of yoga pants and a matching hoodie. I went into the shower and scrubbed my body clean, relishing the awesome shower that I now had in my new apartment. Finishing up, I blow dried my hair, tossing it into a messy bun. I swiped some mascara on along with some lip gloss before walking out into the family room of the apartment. Edward was on the couch, flipping through some channels. When he saw me, his face broke into a radiant grin and he patted on the couch next to him. I walked towards him and sat down, curling my legs underneath me.

“I got a phone call from my brother,” Edward said as he waved his Blackberry at me. “He’s totally infatuated with Alice.”

“Really? They seemed to get pretty cozy last night,” I added.

“They did. They were a step away from public sex,” Edward snorted. “Anyhow, he said that Alice is his soul mate. Love at first sight.”

“Love at first sight?” I asked, quirking a brow.

“Do you not believe in love at first sight?”

“I believe in love but it takes time to build that rapport. Besides, love at first sight happens in fairy tales and fantasy fiction. Not reality,” I said bitterly.

“I’m sorry if I upset you, Bella,” Edward said as he moved me closer to him.

“You didn’t. I’m just jaded,” I said quietly. “I thought I was in love at first sight with Jacob.”

“What happened?” Edward asked as he laced his fingers with mine. It felt perfect to have my hand surrounded by his. I smiled and I squeezed his fingers. Edward responded by picking up our joint hands, kissing each of my knuckles.

“Well, it was my first day on campus at UIC. I had just transferred there and was in a biochemistry class. Jacob was the TA. I thought he was the most handsome man I’d ever seen. Tall, taller than you, russet colored skin, black hair, dark brown eyes, muscular, blindingly white smile, kind and very attentive. Anyhow, we had labs and after the second lab, Jacob asked if I wanted coffee. I’d never been asked out on a date so I immediately said yes. I was shocked that this guy would want to spend time with me.

“We went to a tiny coffee shop just outside of Little Italy and closed down the joint. Jacob said that he was in his last year as a pre-med major. He had already taken his MCATs and was admitted to University of Chicago.”

“You said that Jacob was twenty-two, right?” Edward asked.

“Yeah. He had to take a year off of school to help his dad who had diabetes,” I explained. Edward nodded and kissed my hand again. “Anyhow, from there, our relationship progressed to friendship on his part, but for me it was blossoming into something more. I had fallen in LOVE with Jacob and desperately wanted him. After about a month or so, Jacob finally took me out on a proper date. He picked me up at my old apartment that I shared with my dad and we went bowling and then dinner. He went on and on about how beautiful I was. I loved the attention and as we continued to date, I started to believe it.

“He gave me all of my firsts. My first kiss. My first hug from a guy that wasn’t my dad. My first ‘grope.’ However, it was all very chaste. He never really kissed me like you did last night. He just gave me innocent little pecks or nibbled on my lip.

“About six weeks later, Jacob started to get a bit more aggressive. He wanted more. I was apprehensive but since I thought he loved me and that I knew that I loved him, I was willing.”

“Did he ever say that he loved you?” Edward asked as he rubbed his thumb over my knuckles.

“No. I told him, though. But, I was so naïve. He would give me underhanded compliments and hint that I needed to lose weight during our time together. He also always ordered for me when we went out, getting me a salad or soup as opposed to the massive hamburger or steak that he’d order. I also stopped eating normally as well, to get thinner for him. To make him want me. I was down to about a size ten. I was very proud of my body at that point. I had curves but I wasn’t a twig. I felt comfortable enough to show Jacob everything.

“Anyhow, he makes reservations at this hotel and we have this romantic date at the Hancock Signature Room. I’m wearing this beautiful dress and sexy lingerie underneath, anxiously waiting for the climax of the evening. After dinner, Jacob takes me on a horse-drawn carriage ride before we go into the hotel room. It’s all very romantic. Or at least, started that way. We kissed, still very chastely and slowly our clothes are removed. We fall into bed and Jacob doesn’t say anything. He just stares at me. His distaste is hidden but I could see the disgust in his eyes. I was still too fat for him. But, we continue. There’s very little foreplay. Jacob just kissed me briefly and fondled my breasts before grabbing a condom. He put it on and shoved inside of me, no care for what I was feeling.

“It hurt so badly because I really wasn’t ready for him and there was a lot of blood since he tore through my hymen. Before I knew it, my virginity was gone and Jacob had rolled over on his side, ignoring me for the rest of the night.

“The next day, he drove me back to my apartment and said he’d call. He never did,” I sniffled. “I still saw him in class but he ignored me. A few weeks later, I saw him at a party with some blonde bimbo with fake boobs and tiny waist, named Nessie, who was also in our class. He sneered at me when I saw him with her, upset that he never even ‘broke up’ with me. He just fucked me and left. After that, I gave up. I stuffed myself with all of the fattening foods and buried myself in my studying. I graduated top of my class and was offered numerous positions at many hospitals. I was this close to going to Minnesota to work at the Mayo Clinic, but decided to stay here because of my dad. He was healthy at the time, but I thought he’d get lonely.”

“Have you seen Jacob since?” Edward asked tersely, his showing his anger.

“No. Not recently,” I answered. “I ran into him one day on the el but he didn’t even acknowledge me. He just looked right through me, ignoring me. I honestly hope I never see him again. From what I’ve heard, he’s a first-class douche.”

“You said he’s a surgeon?”

“Yeah, up at Northwestern,” I said. “He’s like the head of cardiothoracic surgery or something. He totally has a major ‘God-complex.’”

“Most surgeons do,” Edward chuckled. Then his smile faded. “You didn’t date anyone else after Jacob?”

“No. He hurt me too much,” I frowned. “Besides, after what he put me through, I figured, who would want this?” I gestured to my body, still disgusted at the rolls and lumps underneath my clothing.

“I do,” Edward said simply. “Bella nobody is perfect. If we were, we’d be gods. And we’re not. We all have our faults. I told you mine. And yes, I know that I’m in shape, but that doesn’t mean that I’m perfect. Everyone has their quirks and nuances that make them special and beautiful. A person can be completely ravishing on the outside, but their heart can be as black as night and that’s what makes them ugly. Jacob sounds like that. He may have physical beauty but what he did to you was deplorable. You deserve someone better than that. Someone who knows how to love and apparently, he didn’t. Or rather, he doesn’t.”

“I know that now, but at the time, all I wanted was to be his and I figured that if I gave my virginity to him, I would be,” I sniffled. “I guess not. Not that I want to be his, anyway. He probably is so narcissistic that he can’t see past his miniscule cock.”

“Small?” Edward chortled. I held up my ring finger, wrinkling my nose. “Damn. That’s pretty sad. And I’m going to be completely honest with you, I’m bigger than that. MUCH bigger.”

“You sound like I’m going to be bedded by you, Dr. Cullen,” I giggled.

“I hope so. But, it’s at the pace that you want,” he said sincerely.

“I told you about my pathetic love life, it’s your turn,” I said, giving him an encouraging smile.

“Seems fair,” Edward said as he moved his arm to reach behind me. He idly played with my hair as he began telling me about his romantic history. “I was a geek when I was younger. Braces, glasses, acne, scrawny physique. I didn’t really become comfortable with myself until I was in college. My braces were off. I found the wonders of contact lenses. Proactive changed my life and I became good friends with the football players on my floor at Dartmouth who showed me the wonders of the gym. Oh, and I also helped them with their homework. I was still a geek at heart. Anyhow, freshman year of college, I didn’t really date. I just went through my metamorphosis as it were. Sophomore year, I dated around. I’m not going to lie, I became a manwhore. Another flaw…I told you I wasn’t perfect. I lost my virginity in the bathroom of a dingy frat house with some random sorority girl. I don’t remember her name, but we both wanted sex and we got it.”

“Please tell me you were safe,” I frowned.

“God, yes. I’d always used a condom. The only I didn’t was with my ex-wife and that’s because she was on birth control at first and then after that, we wanted to try for a family,” Edward explained. “I may have been a manwhore, but I’m quite fastidious about my junk. I can also assure you that I’m clean and I can give the most recent blood test results for verification, if you want.”

I nodded and blushed. “I trust you, Edward. It’s not like we’re going to have sex right away,” I whispered. “I want to make sure before I do anything more physically with you. I don’t think I could handle another situation like what I had with Jacob.”

“Nor do I expect you to,” Edward said as he gently cupped my face. “You are a gorgeous woman and you deserve to be respected, cared for and loved. I just hope that you feel that I’m worthy of that.”

“Only time will tell,” I said, breaking his intense gaze into my eyes. Edward’s fingers glided to my jaw and he brought my face back up to his. Softly, his lips caressed mine and he leaned his forehead against me. Jesus…this man can kiss. Nothing that Jacob ever did to me compares to what Edward’s mouth can do to me. “Wow…”

“I know,” he whispered back. “I’ve never felt like this, Bella. I get lost when I’m with you and I never want to find my way, as long as you’re near me.” He closed his eyes and kissed me tenderly again before pulling back. “Do you want me to continue?”

“I don’t want to hear about all of your exploits,” I teased.

“God, I would never…I’m not that much of a douche. That’s my brother. He’d break out his little black book and point out all of the positives and negatives for each of his conquests,” Edward said, his green eyes widening in shock. “Anyhow, I never really had a girlfriend in college. Just a string of women who I regularly called when I was horny. It wasn’t until I was in med school that I wanted to settle down. That’s when I met Tanya, my ex-wife.”

“Was she a doctor, too?”

“Yeah. However, she is a plastic surgeon,” Edward explained. “She has a pretty lucrative practice in Seattle. She’s highly sought after by many patients because she revolutionized a new technique for rhinoplasty and is working on a new concoction to permanently erase wrinkles and age spots. Tanya’s brilliant and an amazing doctor.”

“And you said that your marriage ended because…she was gay?” I asked.

“Yep. About two years ago, our sex life stopped. She wouldn’t let me touch her. Our kisses were very innocent and we barely talked. Prior to that, Tanya was very sexual and I’m not going to lie, we had a very healthy sex life,” he laughed nervously, his ears turning a bright red. “When I asked her about it, she said that she loved me but that she was in love with another. I was livid. My wife was cheating on me? Tanya apologized and said that it wasn’t supposed to happen this way, but she met someone while she was at some medical conference in Hawaii named Irina. I about shit my pants when she said that. My wife was in love with a woman. A very butch woman, too. Irina is tall and looks kind of like me minus a dick and plus some very large breasts. Anyhow, long story short, Tanya asked for a divorce which I granted since I am not going to deny her true love. Besides, the love that she and Irina have nothing short of magical. Irina adores her and Tanya is incredibly happy. Once the divorce was final, I packed up my stuff and moved out here to be with my family,” Edward explained.

“Did you like Seattle?”

“Very much. I miss the city a lot. Especially the weather. I hate the cold. But, I wouldn’t leave for anything. There is something here that I don’t think I could ever give up,” he said, grinning at me crookedly.

“What? Your family? Your job?” I questioned, looking into his deep, evergreen eyes.

“Those are important, but that’s not what I’m talking about,” Edward said quietly, almost reverently.

“Well, then, what?”

“You,” he answered.

Be still my frantically beating heart.

Shortly after Edward’s confession, Angela and Ben came out of her room, looking quite happy and very sexed up. They joined us in watching some football before Ben had to go to work. Edward left when Ben did, saying that he needed to get some laundry done and check on his sister. However, I could tell that he didn’t want to leave but chores were calling his name.  Before he left, Edward kissed me senseless and reminded me to read my journal for his note that he wrote to me.

After Ben and Edward left, Angela zonked out of the couch while I went into my room to read the journal that Edward wrote. I was anxious to see what he had to say. I grabbed my new iPod and put it on shuffle. I found my journal on the nightstand. Eagerly, I crawled into my bed, which smelled like Edward’s cologne. I flipped through the pages and found the entry from Edward.

January 1^st, 2013

Dearest Isabella,

This was your idea so I’m going with it, beautiful. However, it seems appropriate since this is your way to work through your feelings that I leave you a note, journal entry, love letter, evidence of my cheesetastic nature. (I’m a dork. I know.)

I know that you haven’t had it easy. I know that you are hesitant to trust. However, I’m so lucky that you’ve opened up to me and that you’re willing to put your trust in me. Bella, you are an amazing, loving, brilliant, gorgeous woman. Someone that I am hopeful will make an impact on my life. You already have, sweet girl. You’ve been a friend to me and someone that I can rely on at work and now, at play.

You are in charge of how fast or how slow we progress with this relationship. I’m a patient man and I will NEVER pressure you into something that you are not comfortable doing. We need to build a trust between each other before we move forward physically, emotionally and mentally. I will also never expect you to change who you are to suit my needs. You’re perfect and beautiful just the way you are.

I know, right now, you’re probably rolling your eyes, doubting what I’m saying but you are. And I’ll keep saying it until I’m blue in the face or until you finally believe it.

I know that we have just met and that we are making that awkward transition from the ‘friendzone’ (blame Emmett for that one…his term) into a more romantic relationship, but the depth of feelings that I have for you are astounding. I have never, EVER felt this way about anyone, including my ex-wife. Yes, I loved her, very much, but it was more of a slow burn whereas with you, it kind of hit me out of nowhere. And that’s a good thing.

Now, onto my cheesetastic part of my note, journal entry, love letter thing…

Will you be my girlfriend? Text me with your response. (I’d say circle one, but I want you to keep this note to re-read at your leisure if you ever forget how much I care for you). Yes or no…

Love,

Edward

My heart is pounding against my chest as I closed my journal. Edward, gorgeous, kind-hearted, intelligent, wonderful Edward wants me to be his girlfriend. Do I trust him? Am I ready to put myself out there?  Would I survive it if we break up? Would he still want me after he sees my body?

I padded to my desk and picked up my cell phone. I scrolled down my contact list and found Edward’s name. I opened up a new text message and put the only thing that I had an answer for and that was his question. Will you be my girlfriend?  Tapping out my response, I sent it off to him.

Yes.

xx APFL xx

To say Edward was ecstatic when I responded to his request was understatement. He called back and said that he was on his way back to my apartment so he could spend some time with me, making out, cuddling and being a couple. Unfortunately, traffic and a very persistent sister prevented that from happening. Edward acted like a petulant child as he drove back to his brownstone, pissing and moaning that he should be with girlfriend.

Holy fuck.

I was Edward’s girlfriend.

Anyhow, moving on. I still have girly squee moments when I think about it. I’ve spaced out more often than not at work. I got yelled out by Dr. Crowley a couple of times because I was not ‘on top of his needs’ while he was suturing several patients. He ripped me apart but instead of crying about it, I just took it. I was wrong. I should have the syringe of lidocaine ready to go. Not daydreaming about my fuckhot boyfriend.

Now, despite the fact that Edward and I are together, I’m still not putting all of my eggs in one basket. I’m still focusing on trying to get myself ‘better.’ I met with a counselor prior to my shift on January 2^nd. We spent an hour talking about my history and what I hoped to get out of the therapy. My counselor, Michele, also asked me if I had any coping mechanisms for when things got tough. I said that I journal since I never really had anyone to talk to. She was pleased but she wanted me to find someone that I could talk to, not Edward, though. I agreed with her on that and I said that I’d try to do that. Michele also asked me to make list of ten things that I find to be positive attributes about myself. Journal about it and bring it for discussion for our next session.

So, here I am, sitting on my bed, trying to figure out ten positive characteristics about myself. I’m falling up short. Big. Time.

January 10^th, 2013

Ten POSITIVE things about Isabella Marie Swan

Before I begin writing these down, let me just say that this is definitely going to be a challenge. I can barely come up with two things, let alone ten. Then again, I’ve been shot down for so long that I’m not sure what to believe anymore. Edward can find so many positive things about me, but me? Hell no! Anyhow, here goes…

One…I’m a good nurse. Despite what anything says, I care about my patients no matter how they act or behave. Nurses are the eyes and ears for the doctors and I feel like I do an adequate job at relaying vitals, problems and symptoms.

Two…I’m patient. Not many people would have the disposition to be a nurse. You have to deal with so much shit, like lancing puss-filled wounds, bedsores; getting peed on, shit on, and puked on and you have to do all of that with a smile. Sometimes it’s tougher than most (if I ever have to deal with my dad, there will be no smile there. He can sit in his own pee and get bedsores up the ying yang).

Three…I’m compassionate. I kind of have to be. No one would like a nurse that’s bitchy and rude. That’s Lauren. HA!

“Sweet girl?” Edward called out. “Angela let me in as she was leaving. I have Chinese.”

I closed my book and carried it out to the kitchen. Edward just got off from work and was looking pretty  damn sexy in his green scrubs. However, he was wearing a pair of dress slacks earlier… “Everything okay, Edward?” I asked, gesturing to his change in attire.

“Gastrointestinal bleed,” he said, wrinkling his nose. “All over my clothes. Nothing was salvageable. Even my favorite shoes were victim to the mess. I’d had those since I was in med school. So, I had to shower like seven times to get the smell out of my nose and raid the Goodwill bin for a pair of shoes. Everything else was tossed.”

“Did the patient make it?” I asked.

“She’s in very critical condition. My dad needs to perform some extensive surgery but wants her to be a touch more stable,” Edward said as he grabbed some plates from the cabinet. “She’s coded twice in the ICU. It doesn’t look good.”

“I’m sorry,” I frowned as I sat down. “I wasn’t expecting you.” When I got home, I had showered and put on some comfy clothes. I looked like a total schlub.

“I can leave,” Edward smirked. “But, I’m taking my Chinese with me.”

“NO! It’s not that,” I mumbled. “Shit, I’m sorry…”

“Bella, it’s okay. After dealing with that patient, I didn’t really want to be alone and I needed to see you. Since we’ve become ‘official,’ we haven’t had any time to go out and do couple-y things.”

“We’re both really busy,” I said somberly. We hadn’t really had any time to hang out since New Year’s Eve.  

“Tell me about it. Tomorrow, I have to sit in on the finance committee meeting since Eleazar is on vacation. Not looking forward to that. I’m excited about my new position but it’s less about doctoring and more about the politics of the damn hospital,” he grumbled.

“But, you’re amazing at what you do, Edward. You handle the politics gracefully. Just like Eleazar,” I said as he sat down. “Eleazar said that they’re looking in adopting the harassment policy that you drafted for the entire hospital. You should be proud of that.”

“I am. He told me,” Edward said as we both divvied out our food. “What you working on in your journal?”

“My homework from Michele,” I answered, shoving the journal away.

“What’s this homework?” Edward chuckled as he dug into his dinner.

“Ten positive characteristics about myself,” I replied, frowning deeply.

“I can come up with at least twenty,” Edward quipped.

“I’ve got three. And they’re all related to my job.”

“Bella,” Edward said, looking at me. “Can I see?” I nodded and turned to the page in the journal, pushing it toward him. He read what I had written while I nibbled on my dinner. He hummed and closed my book.

“So, are you going to help me cheat?” I asked, batting my eyelashes at him.

“That kind of defeats the purpose, Bella,” he said dryly. “These need to be qualities that you see in yourself that are positive. You already know how I think about you, but that’s not what Michele is asking you for. You need to build your self-esteem. I can tell you what I see but it’s my perception of you. Not yours. Plus, those perceptions mean nothing until you start believe them.”

“Jesus, you should have gone into psychiatry,” I laughed nervously.

“That was my backup,” he winked. “I loved my psych rotation when I was in med school. However, with the ER, you  get your fair share of loony patients. It keeps my psych chops whet. Now, why are you having such a hard time with this?”

“I can’t see anything positive in myself other than what I have written,” I frowned. “My dad filled me with his poison and I had no friends until recently…” A few tears fell down my cheeks and I shoved my dish away, not hungry anymore. Edward took my hand and he tugged on it gently. I got up and he pulled me into his lap. I was uncomfortable. I didn’t want to hurt him with my fat ass.

“Bella, I’m stronger than I look,” he said. “I can see you stressing about sitting on my lap.”

“I’m worried about the chair,” I said, trying to joke.

“Isabella,” Edward growled. “Stop.” He buried his nose into my hair, kissing my neck. “I hate those people who hurt you, Bella. I hate them so much because they are stopping you from seeing your potential.” He sighed and moved his soft lips to my earlobe, flicking it with his tongue. Oh, sweet baby Jesus. “I’m not going to help you cheat. But, I will tell you one thing that I find to be a positive attribute. Only one,” he said into my hair. “Grab your journal, sweet girl.”

I picked it up and grabbed a pen. I looked at Edward expectantly. “Number four,” I said as I jotted that down.

Four…Loving soul…Despite the cruelties you’ve experienced in this world, you are still capable of loving others and being loved by your friends, co-workers and significant others.

“Why don’t you continue working on that? I’ll put the food away, sweet girl,” Edward said as he kissed me softly.

“Kay,” I murmured as I got up from his lap. “Thank you, Edward.”

“You’re welcome, Bella,” he said as he lightly smacked my ass as I passed him. I ruffled his soft hair and plopped down on the couch in the family room. I nibbled on the pen as I thought of some more positive attributes.

Five…Loyal to those I care about, no matter what. Even though my dad was an asshole, I still took care of him. I do the same for my new-found friends, as well.

Six...Generous. I may not have a lot of money but I give what I can to my friends in the form of attention, caring and conversation.

Seven…Stubborn. Now, before you freak out about this, I feel that it’s a positive attribute. My stubborn nature is what prevented me from walking away from my job, my home and my life. I had to PROVE to myself that I could do it. You know?

Eight…Innocent. Even though my life has sucked I still see the good in people, try to find their innocence. However, I hate when people see me and exploit my innocence just because I’m kind.

“How’s it going?” Edward asked as he sat down next to me.

“I got eight,” I said, looking into his eyes.

“Good job, sweet girl,” he said as he moved my journal onto the cocktail table. He lay down putting his head in my lap. I chuckled and twined my fingers into his thick hair, something that he loved when I scratched his scalp.

“Are you going to start purring?” I teased.

“It feels so good,” he laughed as he nuzzled his cheek against my thigh. “So, I was thinking that we go out on a date. A REAL date. I’m a douche and haven’t taken you out, yet.”

“Like you wear something nice and I get all gussied up?”

“Yep. I checked our schedules and the only day that we’re both free in the evening is this coming Wednesday. I kind of pulled in a few favors, if you’re interested,” he said. “I want to take my beautiful girlfriend out for a wonderful evening out.”

“I’m still in shock about that,” I said as gently tugged on Edward’s hair.

“What? That you’re beautiful or that you’re my girlfriend?” Edward teased as he sat up. His green eyes darkened and his lips gently brushed against mine. He rearranged himself on the couch and guided me to straddle his legs, all while kissing me senseless.

We finally break apart, breathing heavily. “No fair,” I pouted.

“What?” he snickered.

“You charmer, you. Totally dazzling me,” I said as I tried to get off his lap. However, Edward’s arms tightened around my waist.

“I do not dazzle you,” he snorted. His lips found the sensitive spot behind my ear and I literally melted into his arms.

“Uh huh and I’m a natural blonde, Cullen,” I said breathily. “I’m a puddle of Bella goo right now.”

“Okay, I dazzle a little,” he said as he continued kissing my neck. He moved his mouth up my jaw and finally reached my lips, barely touching them with his. “You are an amazing kisser, Bella.” He cupped the back of my neck and our mouths clashed together feverishly. “The best. Ever,” he murmured against my mouth. “You should put that down on your list. Best fucking kisser.”

“I think Michele is looking for personality attributes, not physical ones,” I giggled, gently scratching my fingers into his hair.

“Minor technicalities. Besides Bella, you better get used to being called beautiful because you are. Plus all of those personality attributes, too. It’s the combination of the physical and the personality that makes you so fucking special, Bella. And I’m so happy you’re my girlfriend,” Edward said as he took my face into his hands. “Seriously, when you texted yes, I was ready to cross across six lanes of traffic on Lake Shore Drive to come back here, sweet girl. But, I didn’t want to get into a car accident or anything, plus my sister was demanding to see me. She had an epiphany of sorts.”

“Really?”

“Yeah. I don’t want to tell you much since Rose is still coming to grips with what happened to her, but she was attacked on the day before her college graduation by her then boyfriend. That attack tore her to shreds and she stopped eating. She was getting better but on Christmas night, she saw her ex-boyfriend at church which caused her to regress. Our attorney dropped the ball and neglected to tell us that he was released for ‘good behavior.’ However, since he was so close to my sister, his bail was revoked and he’s back in jail. Anyhow, Rose saw Emmett when we were moving your desk out of Jasper’s room. She was intrigued by him and said that she was going to go to outpatient therapy for her anorexia and PTSD counseling for her attack.”

“That’s good that she wants to get help but aren’t you concerned about her reasoning behind it?”I asked.

“Hmmm, slightly. But you have to understand that my sister never wanted to have a man look at her again after her attack. The fact that she was so excited by Emmett is a good thing,” Edward explained. “It proves to us that she’s not completely broken, like she says. My sister, right now, trusts three men. Our dad, Jasper and me. However, she trusts me the most since I protected after her attack. Also, I don’t look like Royce King. My brother and dad both have blonde hair and she freaks out when she sees men with blonde hair, for obvious reasons.”

“Holy shit! I remember that story from the newspapers! I read what was done to the victim and I was sickened,” I blanched. “What a monster!”

“Yeah,” Edward said as he held me closer to his body. “I hated what he did to my baby sister. I hate him. I wish he were dead, Bella.”

“I don’t blame you,” I murmured as I comforted him.

He sighed and buried his face into the crook of my neck. I felt dampness against my shirt and I knew that he was crying. Obviously, this weighed heavily on his heart that he couldn’t protect his sister. We didn’t talk. I just massaged his scalp as he silently fell apart. It wasn’t until my feet started falling asleep that we broke apart. Edward wiped his cheeks, giving me an embarrassed grin and mumbling an apology. “So, back to our date,” he said. “Rose would kick my ass if she knew that I was beating myself up. Besides, she’s living vicariously through me and Jasper.”

“Where are we going?” I asked.

“Well, that’s for me to know and for you to find out,” Edward snickered as he kissed my nose.

“I’d like to know so I know what to wear. I don’t want you to take me to the opera and I’m wearing jeans,” I quipped.

“Let me finalize our plans and then I’ll let you know,” Edward smirked. “When do you have to work tomorrow?”

“Three to midnight,” I answered.

“Me too. Want to watch a movie, sweet girl? Then we can cuddle in bed afterward.”

“That sounds perfect,” I smiled. “Why don’t you pick a movie while I make some popcorn?”

“I love the way you think, Bella,” he said as he kissed my lips swiftly before hopping up to the entertainment center. I made some microwave popcorn and put it into a plastic bowl. Edward chose one of my favorite films, Shawshank Redemption and was waiting for me when I was done with the popcorn. We nibbled on the snack as we watched the movie. However, I was tired since I worked the earlier shift. I honestly don’t remember falling asleep but the next thing I did remember was being lifted from the couch.

“No,” I moaned.

“Shhh, sweet girl. I’ve got you,” he cooed as he cradled me against his chest. I was too tired to protest too much. Edward removed my socks and tucked me into bed. “I’ll be back, Bella. Going to take out my contacts.”

“Mmmm,” I mumbled as curled up against my pillows. I faintly recall Edward climbing into bed with me, cuddling around me as he kissed my neck. “Feels good.”

“I’m glad, sweet girl,” he purred. “Sleep, baby. I’ll be here in the morning.”

“Promise?”

“I promise, Bella,” he chuckled.

xx APFL xx

“Damn it, Bella, when was the last time you had your brows waxed?” Alice asked as she attacked my face with strange implements.

“Um, never?” I squeaked. “What the hell is that?”

“Eye lash curler,” she said. “Angela, do you have any wax?”

“I do. I’ll go heat it up,” Angela laughed as she skipped into the kitchen. “Bells, I love you but the brows are a bit much.”

“You suck,” I grumbled. “Both of you. Edward never mentioned anything about my brows.”

“That’s because he needs a wax, too. It’s like two caterpillars above his eyes,” Alice muttered. “Trust me, Bella.”

It was the day of my first ‘date’ with Edward. Though, technically it was the second date we’d been on. I pointed out that we went out to eat on Christmas Eve. Edward put the kibosh on that, saying that we were just friends at that point. This was our first romantic date. And he intended to wine and dine me, he said.

With the help of Angela and Alice, I chose my outfit for the date. They both knew where I was going. I was still clueless, though. But, based off what I had picked out, it was going to be somewhat dressy since I was opting for a pair of dark gray slacks, a pink blouse and one of Alice’s mom’s coats that she ‘didn’t care for.’ I straightened my hair and was now getting my makeup done by Alice and impatiently waiting in getting my brows waxed.  Won’t that hurt?

Angela came back in with a small tub of wax and some strips of fabric. “Let’s do this together, Alice. The look on Bella’s face indicates that she’s scared shitless about this,” Angela giggled.

“You’re putting hot wax on my face to remove hair!” I shrieked. “This is normal?”

“Yes, Bella,” Alice said sagely. “Most women get their brows waxed. Be grateful we’re not waxing your cooter.”

“WHAT?!”

“Too early for that, Alice,” Angela said seriously. “In time, Bells, you will enjoy the benefits of getting your pussy waxed.”

“Why?” I whimpered.

“When Edward goes down on you,” Alice answered, arching a perfectly shaped brow.

“Ew. Won’t he find that to be nasty?” I asked. “Won’t I smell? I mean…really?”

“Bella, surely you’re not that innocent,” Alice replied. I frowned and felt my cheeks heat up. “Shit. Are you a virgin?”

“No,” I mumbled. “But my one experience wasn’t very satisfying.”

“Did he do anything? Any foreplay?” Angela asked as she crouched in front of me.

“Nope. We kissed a bit and he felt up my boobs but then it was put on the condom, push in and then done,” I frowned.

“Does Edward know this?” Alice asked, her violet eyes filled with fury.

“Yeah, we talked about our pasts on New Year’s,” I answered. “After I gave up my virginity to this guy, he said he’d call but he never did.”

“Where are my stilettos? Let’s kick his ass,” Angela growled. “What a douche!”

“Bella, have you ever had an orgasm?” Alice asked calmly, smacking at Angela. I bit my lip and shook my head no. The walls were always too thin. I didn’t want my dad hearing that. “Not even by masturbating?”

“No,” I whispered. “God, you don’t think…?”

 “Oh, Bella, we are so going to have a girl’s night out after your date with Dr. Sexward,” Alice giggled. 

“Who else should we invite, Ang?”

“Definitely not the slut sisters,” Angela snorted. “Lauren is behaving herself but Jessica is about ready to spit nails at Bella. She suspects something is going on between the two of them.”

“We haven’t announced our relationship and we doubt we will,” I said. “I mean, I’m going to the ball thing with Edward in February.”

“Shut the front door and say it ain’t so!” Alice squealed. “We so need to go shopping for your gown, Bella!”

“Let me get through my first date,” I said.

“Fine,” she pouted. “Angela, reheat the wax.”

“Kay,” Ang said as she skipped out of the room again. She comes back a few moments later and they attack my brows. I was right. It hurt like a son of a bitch. Once they were done with my brows, Alice said that my skin needed to calm down before she finished with my makeup. I yielded to her expertise in the makeup department since I was not very adept in applying it without making myself look like a clown. Mascara and some lip gloss was my standard face but I wanted to look pretty for Edward. I used the time that they gave me to write in my journal.

January 16^th, 2013

Today is my first date with Edward. According to him, that is. I mean, we’ve been a couple for nearly two weeks now and have gone out to dinner on Christmas Eve, but this is our FIRST DATE.

Is it wrong that I’m a little nervous?

I mean, we’ve kissed, cuddled, shared a bed and we’ve seen each other cry. Why in the hell am I fucking nervous?

Right, because my boyfriend is sexy as fuck and I have NO idea what he sees me, Nurse Swine.

Shit, if Edward knew that I was thinking that, he’d be pissed. I just have such a hard time wrapping my head around the fact that this kind, loving, handsome and brilliant man wants to be with me. I’m trying to see it, but I just can’t. What do I have to offer the relationship?

Beauty? Not really. I’ve got nice skin and okay hair.

Brains? Edward’s a fucking doctor. I’m just a nurse.

Compassion? We’re pretty equal in that…well, he’s more compassionate than me but this is only quality that we share.

I don’t know. I’m trying to get better for me. I’m trying to see the positive. I really am. But, I’m so afraid that I’m a lost cause. Why can’t I accept the fact that Edward likes me for me?

“Bells? Why are you crying?” Angela asked as she sat down next to me.

“Just having a pitiful moment,” I frowned. “I still can’t believe that Edward wants to be with me. I mean, look at him, Ang. He’s fucking gorgeous and I’m so not.”

“Bella, you are beautiful, too,” Angela said as she hugged me. “Dr. Cullen is completely enamored with you. Besides, his beauty is deeper than his looks. The fact that he’s a good man also makes him more attractive. However, I don’t expect you to change how you feel or that I have some cure-all for your feelings. However, you can’t let your self-doubt push him away, Bella. He may be enamored with you but will he still feel the same way if you constantly put yourself down or question the authenticity of his feelings?”

“You’re right, Ang,” I sighed. “I’m trying. I really am, but it’s not going to happen overnight.”

“I know. But, Bella, I’ll be here as a friend no matter what happens. I’m happy that you’re here with me and that you’re finally taking control of your life. I’m ecstatic that Edward is showing you that you are worthy of being cared for and loved. He may not know it, but I think he already loves you, Bella. The only other time I see the way Edward looks at you is my parents. My dad adores my mom and he stares at her the way Edward stares at you. But, don’t quote me on that. He’ll say it when he’s ready. So, will you. Now, let me put on your makeup so you can knock some socks off a handsome, sexy doctor.”

Angela quietly and expertly put on my makeup as I calmed myself, trying to forget about my pity party in my journal that I had. Alice came back in and she worked on my hair. A half-hour later, I was done and was waiting for Edward with my two girlfriends, drinking some wine. Ten minutes after I was ‘beautified,’ the buzzer in the apartment rang. Angela hopped up and hissed quietly to presumably Edward.

A quiet knock filled the apartment and the girls made themselves scarce in Angela’s bedroom, giggling as they danced away. I rolled my eyes and teetered to the door. Alice let me choose my own outfit but she insisted that she got to pick my shoes. I was wearing a pair of gray heeled booties that seriously threatened my safety. I can already feel the broken bones.

I opened the door and on the other side was Edward. He was holding a large bouquet of red roses, pink tea roses, some white flowers that I didn’t recognize. On his face, he wore his signature crooked smirk as he held out the bouquet of flowers. “For you, sweet girl. They are the ‘crazy for you’ arrangement. It seemed fitting since I’m definitely crazy for you,” he chuckled as I took the flowers into my hands.

“They’re beautiful,” I smiled as I inhaled the fragrant blooms. “Come in. I need to put these into some water.” I stepped aside and let Edward into the apartment. I searched the cabinets for a vase but the only one I found was too tall for me to get. Edward chuckled as he watched me stand on my tiptoes to try and reach it. With his long arms, he easily plucked the silver vase from its home above the fridge and handed it to me. I thanked him with a kiss on his lips and put the flowers into the vase, carrying it to my bedroom. I placed it on my desk, smiling softly at them.

Edward slipped behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist, his chin resting on my shoulder. “Why are you smiling, beautiful?”

“No one has ever gotten me flowers,” I answered honestly.

“Really? I’m the first?” he asked as he kissed my neck. I nodded, settling into his embrace. “I’m glad that I was able to give you something special, Bella You deserve so much, sweet girl.”

“Thank you,” I smiled as I turned in his arms. His responding grin was so genuine and beautiful; it nearly brought tears to my eyes. He pressed his lips against mine and he laced his fingers in my hand. All too soon, he pulled away and he gently guided me to the family room. Edward picked up my coat and helped into it. Twining our hands together, we left the apartment and down to his car. “Wait a minute. Where’s your Volvo?”

“At home,” he smirked. “This is a special occasion, sweet girl. So, the special occasion car gets to come out and play.”

“What the hell is this?” I asked as I gaped openly at the red vehicle in front of me.

“An Aston Martin DB9,” he answered casually. “She purrs like a kitten and I can’t wait to see you inside of her.” Edward opened the door and I sank into the luxurious vehicle. Jesus, the inside of this car is fucking 

perfect. “You like her, huh?”

“I’ve never been inside anything like this,” I breathed. “Now, don’t get me wrong, how can you afford this?”

“Well, being a doctor does allow me to have a lifestyle that I enjoy. I get paid good money but there are a few things that you should know, Bella,” Edward said as he started the car. “Number one, this car is a gift from my ex-wife. After she made her first million as a plastic surgeon, she asked me what type of car I’d cream myself over. This little gem was my response. Number two, my grandparents were very well off and I am honestly a trust fund baby. Rose, Jasper and I each have multi millions in the bank from Grandpa Cullen when he passed.”

“Fuck me,” I groaned as I slipped further into the seat.

“Not on the first date, sweet girl,” Edward snorted.

“Did Tanya know about…?” I asked.

“She did but since our marriage ended amicably, she was adamant that my trust not be touched. She makes an amazing amount of money. It’s shocking how much money people are willing to spend on Botox injections, breast implants and nose jobs,” Edward chuckled. “I’ve honestly never really dipped into my trust. The first time was when I bought my brownstone.”

“Why are you telling me this? I mean, aren’t you pretty much flagging yourself for some gold-digging ho?” I questioned, furrowing my brow.

“I’m telling you this, Bella, because I trust you. Besides, I know that you are not, and I quote, ‘a gold-digging ho,’” he said dryly. “That would be Lauren or Jessica. They would see my car and want to have unprotected sex with me so I’d get ensnared in some baby drama and be forced to care for them.”

“And then your dick would fall off from all of the venereal diseases it would be exposed to,” I said, scrunching my face distastefully.

“No, thank you,” Edward cringed. He pulled up to a restaurant off of Rush Street called MK. Quietly, Edward shook the valet’s hand, palming him some money before he jogged around to help me out of the passenger seat. Inside of the restaurant, we were led to a quiet corner of the lounge. The table was covered with a crisp white table cloth and a tea light candle flickered. It was very romantic.

Edward and I ordered our food and chatted about our childhoods. I shared my litany of clumsy moments while Edward told me about his dorky pastimes of playing Dungeons and Dragons with his neighbors. Over dessert, we talked about our plans for the ball. Edward said the ball was going to be hosted at the Peninsula Hotel in downtown. He had already reserved a room for us, but was willing to cancel it if I wasn’t comfortable. However, I’d slept with him before and was more than willing to sleep with him again. I was ready to offer to pay for half of the room, but Edward wouldn’t hear of it. He said that it was his intention to spoil me at the ball and that included us staying in the Grand Deluxe Suite. Edward silenced my objections with a panty melting kiss and paid our bill.

I was honestly thinking that our date was over but I was in for a surprise when Edward pulled up the Shedd Aquarium. I had mentioned it in passing that I had never been there but I loved beluga whales and the different sea creatures. But it was nearly nine at night. Surely the aquarium was closed.

Almost as Edward read my mind, he parked the car in front of the aquarium and helped me out of the car. We walked up the stairs and were greeted by an older gentleman with an impish grin. “Little Eddie Cullen is all grown up,” he snickered.

“Hello, Mr. Banner,” Edward said as he held out his hand. “Thank you for arranging this and for being here.”

“Not a problem. It’s the least I can do for my favorite student,” Mr. Banner said, winking at him. “Who’s this beautiful young lady? Your wife?”

“Not yet, Mr. B.,” Edward chuckled. “This is my girlfriend, Bella Swan. Bella, this is my former biology teacher, Ralph Banner. After he retired, Mr. Banner volunteered his time at the Shedd Aquarium, fulfilling his childhood dream of being a marine biologist, right?” 

“Right,” Mr. Banner chuckled. “I get to feed the penguins. It’s so fun!”

“Nice to meet you, Mr. Banner,” I said politely.

“You as well, Bella. Now, Eddie, you can stay until midnight. I’ll be in my office. Just call me when you’re ready to go,” Mr. Banner smirked as he let us inside of the massive museum. Edward took my coat and we hung it in the coat check near the entrance of the aquarium. We walked to the rear of the building, heading toward the Abbott Oceanarium. Inside, there was marine biologist standing, waiting for them. He introduced himself as Peter and he explained that we were going to get a private showing of the dolphins and beluga whales. We watched the show and even got to touch the animals. Their skin was rubbery but insanely soft.

After our private showing, Peter thanked us and we left the oceanarium. We headed to the lower level and watched the dolphins and whales swim idly in their tanks. Edward hummed quietly as we swayed together. 

“Hmmm, dance with me, Bella,” he whispered.

“There’s no music,” I replied.

Edward let me go and behind him was an iPod dock. He pressed play and some slow, sultry jazz filled the cavernous room. He pulled me into his arms, holding my right hand above his heart and my left on his shoulder. Gently, he put my head on his other shoulder and we moved fluidly to the sounds of Michael Bublé and Harry Connick Jr. As we danced, Edward gently cupped my chin and his lips met mine in a sweet kiss. His mouth was soft but demanding against mine and I just melted into his embrace. Tenderly, Edward nibbled on my top lip. I moaned quietly, opening my mouth. He slipped his tongue between my lips and together, our tongues danced languidly with each other.

Edward’s hand moved from my face to my hips, resting above the swell of my ass. His other hand twisted in my hair as he held me flush to his hard body. “Bella,” he breathed as he moved his mouth from mine but his lips never left my skin. He softly kissed down my jaw until he reached my earlobe, sucking it between his teeth. “So beautiful…” he murmured against my ear.

Feeling bold, I took Edward’s face in my hands and stared into his deep, evergreen eyes. I ran my fingers down his cheeks and traced his jaw, eliciting a low growl from him that quite honestly, turned me on. I stood on my tiptoes and gently pressed a kiss to his lips. I didn’t stay there long. I kissed along his cheeks and down his jaw until I reached the crook where his neck met his shoulder. I swirled my tongue, inhaling his clean, masculine scent before kissing back to his mouth. Once there, Edward’s lips crashed against mine and he held me so tightly. I could feel his excitement press against my hip and I bit back my own growl. 

Edward’s tongue slid between my teeth. His hands tightened in my hair and on my hip, moving further down to cup my ass. I moaned louder and it echoed in the eerie blue room. We broke apart and the only sound we heard was the music and our heavy panting.

“Dr. Cullen?” called Peter.

“Yes,” Edward responded, his voice deep and husky.

“I’m sorry, but it’s almost time,” he said.

“Thank you, Peter. Do you have what I asked for?” Edward asked.

“Yes, sir. It’s with your coats,” Peter smiled. “You have a lovely evening. It was nice meeting you, Miss Swan.”

“Thank you for everything, Peter. This was amazing,” I blushed. Peter nodded and he turned to leave. Edward flipped off the sound dock and picked up the iPod, slipping it into his pocket. With one more sweet, soft kiss, he tangled his fingers into mine and we headed up to the foyer. Mr. Banner was waiting with a sheepish grin.

“I’m sorry, kiddo. If I could, I’d let you stay all night but the boss man only said ‘til midnight,” he chuckled.

“Tell him thank you,” Edward said as he shook Mr. Banner’s hand. “I wanted to make our evening perfect and you helped tremendously.”

“Invite me to your wedding,” Mr. Banner snorted. “Drive safely, kids.”

We put on our coats and Mr. Banner locked the front door as we left the aquarium. Edward held a small bag and kept it close to his chest as we walked to his car. The drive back to my apartment was quiet but it wasn’t tense. The silence was soothing and calm. With a contented sigh, I put my head on Edward’s shoulder as he sped down Lake Shore Drive to my home.

All too soon, he pulled up to my apartment and we were riding up the elevator. I didn’t want the night to end. I wanted it to last forever.

We walked up to my door and Edward took my face in his large, warm hands. “I had a wonderful evening, Bella,” he whispered before he kissed me gently, as if I was the most cherished woman in the world.

“Are you staying?” I asked.

“Not tonight, sweet girl. I’m not that easy. At least not anymore,” he quipped. My face fell. “It’s not that I don’t want to stay. I do. Very much. But, you’ve beguiled me with your soft voice, beautiful eyes and luscious lips. I want to make love to you and tonight is not that night.”

“Oh,” I said, pulling my brows together.

“I promise I will spend the night soon, Bella. But for now, this needs to be dealt with,” he said as he pressed his hips against mine and again, I felt his arousal. It was still rock hard.

“I have a shower,” I giggled.

“I want you,” he growled as he nipped at my ear. “Now, I may not be staying with you but I do have something that might make things a little easier.” He held up the bag and placed it in my hands. “Open it up, beautiful.”

I arched a brow and looked inside the plastic bag. There was a medium sized stuffed beluga whale with bright blue eyes and wide smile. I squealed like a fucking moron but hugged my whale to my chest. “It’s so adorable! Thank you, Edward. I love him.”

“Good,” he chuckled. “He’ll keep you company tonight while you dream of me.”

“He will,” I smirked. “Thank you for the most wonderful date, Edward. This has been nothing short of a dream come true.”

“I aim to please, my Bella,” he said as he kissed my lips softly. “I’ll send you a text when I get home. See you tomorrow?”

“See you tomorrow,” I breathed as I kissed his mouth again. Once I clicked the door shut, I took off my coat, slid off my shoes and grabbed my journal while holding my stuffed beluga whale.

January 17^th, 2013

First date with Dr. Edward Cullen = complete and total romance! Holy crap! It was perfect. Amazing. Best. First. Date. Ever! He was a gentleman, kind and wow…I need some more adjectives. My fears from earlier were unfounded and I really need to pull my head out of my ass.

But there are three things of which I’m certain…

One…With the help of my friends and Edward, I think I can get over this self-esteem issue. They all are amazing to me and I am finally beginning to feel comfortable in my own skin.

Two…Edward has a right to be jealous of the beluga whale he gave me tonight because he gets to cuddle with me and my hot doc doesn’t. BWAHAHA!

Three…I think I’m in love with Edward. Scratch that. I know I’m in love with Edward.

I just pray it doesn’t bite me in the ass.

A/N: There’s your first date and some sweet Dr. Sexward Tattward loving. Well, not full loving. Not yet. We need to build up the anticipation. I hope that you all enjoyed the date and Edward’s little quirks that he has. As for Bella, she’s going to have her insecure moments. We all do. Anyhow, a big insecure moment is going to be coming in the next chapter. I’ll give you a hint…two characters meet and there is a misunderstanding. Also, come hang out in my Facebook group…Tufano79 Twilight Fanfiction Appreciation. We have oodles of teasers, conversations and Rob porn love. *Raise your hand if you are as excited that the Sex hair is back at Comic Con!  He is one sexy ass man. Nummy!*